A lot can happen over coffee. Though Cafe Coffee Day claims so, there’s been happening a lot over our Rs.10 by 2 coffees too. Note my new philosophy: coffee leads to enlightenment 🙄
I should say I am privileged to be a member of 2 coffee-drinking groups at my work place – a She(s)-only group and a He(s)-only group. (Don’t worry about what I am doing in the second group because none of us do either :?) And the memberships’ outcome?? That I’ve become eligible to write the Part II of Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus 😆 Well guys, just keep your hearts light and see what I’ve discovered over coffees with my He-She club members.
Sip 1. Top on their Minds???
The He-Club: The city traffic and as such the whole Bangalore infrastructure needs a revolution. Ok. There’s this new app in the android market for downloads. Ok. With 5 years experience his CTC should be this much. Period! Ok. Yesterday’s cricket ……blah..blah..blah (Blah for me as I don’t understand the cricket language). Ok. The market’s terribly down, bad situation. Ok. Weather is too bad to do anything. Ok.
The Me: It’s always an Ok in-between, they don’t agree/disagree or comment much about each other’s views). I like that. And every He thinks he knows everything about every politics, sports and city. (Do they actually, I doubt :)) Nevertheless, they make me feel that I am talking to experts 😎
The She-Club: Shopping. Clothing. Family. Mother-in-laws. Celebrities. Recipes. Husbands. Savings. Movies. School life. College days. Health. Other’s boyfriends. Songs. Weddings. Crushes. Orkut. Sarees. Children. Vegetables. Handbags. Nail polish. Jewellery. Shoes. Hair colouring. Photographs. Gas connection. Washing socks. Babies. Hair straightening. Mothers. Guys. TV serials. Weather. Roomates. BMTC buses. Dreams. Cousins. Facebook. Books. Sleep. SMS Jokes. Colleagues. Intuitions. Sisters. Fitness………Believe me all over a single coffee!
The Me: Sounds too much? They are! And when one leaves a small gap, the other picks up and the chain continues non-stop. Varieties and spontaneity – I love them(us) for this 🙂
Sip 2. Deep love for???
The She-Club: Mother-In-Laws: No, they absolutely cannot survive without remembering their MILs! MILs occupy so much of their brain space that I sometimes wonder if they were married to the mother-in-laws or the husbands 😐 And by all their descriptions, I could only imagine MILs as inspector generals inspecting every inch of their homes every fortnight 🙄 Such is their never-ending love for MILs all the time. And if at all we, unmarried girls got a chance to speak in between, it was because we spoke about our sisters’ mother-in-laws 🙁
The Me: Two women in love with the same man – Is it that bad? Well, they tell me that I am still innocent to understand why mother-in-laws have to be mother-in-flaws all the time. They also tell me it requires to be married to get enlightened on that. So, fingers crossed, waiting for my lady-love 😆
The He-Club: Bosses: I didn’t know men too grieve about other people. But there is a difference. They grieve with dignity. Especially if its a She-boss, there’s always a Mike Tyson jumping inside their brains boxing at her though in reality they behave absolutely gentle with their royal Queens 😳
The Me: I support them earnestly. She-bosses are tougher than their wives 😡
Sip 3. Second Love for???
The She-Club: Their Maids!
The He-club: Politicians!
Sip 4. Monday Mornings???
The She-Club: So they reached home on Friday evening…..Had dinner outside in the Italian Restaurant…..Slept well…..Woke up late on Saturday…..Husband’s breakfast felt better than their’s….Thinking about what to wear to the mall….Clothes spinning in the washing machine…..Hus watching cricket….Irritating…..Still deciding what to wear….Had to hurry for a bath…..At last got a kurta to wear on a jean……Quick lunch ready……Oops….didn’t realize kurta had to be given for dry cleaning…..Next change now…..Hus is restless…..Another kurta but matching earings missing….Hus is in tension now…..Somehow made to the mall…..First shop…..pretty jewelery set but expensive, didn’t buy…..Second shop……Favourite pink colour top but not fitting, didn’t buy……Third shop…..please excuse my memory after this for Saturday….Sunday began…..Hus’s friend came home…..Irritating….Had to be taken to sister’s house as a compensation…..Sis got a pretty blue saree….Sis’ mother-in-law wasn’t happy about it…..Had dinner…..Reached home…..How bad! Weekend was over 🙁
Uuf! This was their brief weekend 😮
The He-Club: Hahn bhai, weekend was good!
This was their weekend in brief 😯
The Me: The She-club sounded interesting until Saturday evening. After that I fell in for an attention deficit in between but I came back just in time when the mother-in-law part was being played, luckily that was the end of the reel 😉 The He-club – Do they have a weekend-specific amnesia? 👿
Sip 5. Their Spouses???
The She-Club: They simply enjoy going on and on and on about their husbands, be it on anything. And every time I hear about them, somehow this feeling of “poor fellow” gets attached 😆
The He-Club: I sometimes doubt if they really live with their wives. Wives are kept so secretive. They don’t spill a word about them. Can somebody please tell me why?
Sip 6. Humour???
The She-Club: Coffee spills. Giggle. Fingers hurt. Giggle. Tissue paper flying away. Now gigg….giggl…..lau…..LAUGH!
The Me: They don’t need a reason to giggle, they do at almost any normal stuff. A lot of Oh My Ghoshs, eeks, sheeshs, woos, wows and high-pitched squeals of delight – it’s all N-O-R-M-A-L!
The He-Club: Coffee spills. Never mind. Fingers hurt. It happens. Tissue paper flying away. Well, let’s take another one.
The Me: Especially somebody like me with a V.V.poor laughing threshold, it’s embarrassing to laugh aloud amidst these morons. I will have to cut on my laughter in the middle way every time to stay dignified 😈
Sip 7. Silence???
The She-Club: Silence can only be a phantasy! If at all it happens even for few seconds, it means something’s terribly wrong 😯
The He-Club: It’s not unusual. Probably that’s when they take time to look at women And after few sips of deep thinking, someone remembers the newspaper headlines and then it’s all greek for me 😡
Sip 8. Guys/Girls???
The She-Club: That blue-checks guy is handsome? Well, it’s declared openly. And all are open to have a look at him and voice their opinions on this. That tall guy is really tall? Everybody is signaled not to turn and look. Everybody understands the signal. And everybody turn at once to admire his height 😆 Believe me, I love girls (us) for this. And the next day it doesn’t matter if the blue checks comes in red stripes, their memory is strong enough to spot them out.
The He-Club: All men like pretty women! They sip their coffees as though they are unmindful of the girl, but I can see their eyes following 🙂 And there are no open declarations here. Probably because there’s still a girl amongst them or pertaining to the fact that ALL our He-club members are married Hes. There’s one more thing here. Though pretty girls are liked, they all have a problem with female faces which are slightly overly painted. They give a look as though the girl sitting across’ pink mascara is impairing their visions. I sometimes worry if my matching-matching earrings and bangles irritate them ❓
Sip 9. Gossips???
The She-Club: In their genes! From far if you want to spot out a gossip, watch for this: At once all the girls will leave their relaxed posture and converge their heads towards the centre with shining eyes – it means something’s going on 💡 I especially love the facial expressions and the hand movements attached to it. And they just don’t care who’s being damaged and what’s being damaged, sometimes it’s like character assassinations 😆 And the best thing I enjoy in the She-club!
The He-Club: Before I joined this club, I assumed men are innocent and don’t do this stuff. C’mon girls, they aren’t! It’s just that they don’t make an apparent move towards the centre. And their hands don’t move. Otherwise totally functioning in their genes too, accompanied by a wicked smile 😮
Sip 10. Now who pays the bill???
The She-Club: Realistic! See everybody works hard to earn a penny. So be just, take a calculator and let’ do some mathematics ❗
The He-Club: Whichever wallet comes out first! C’mon, I carry a wallet too 😆
So what’s the over-all enlightenment?
With the She-club, I see the little girl in me popping out with bubbles of giggles and gossips. And with the He-club, I see the mature professional woman in me carrying herself with poise and dignity (Do I??). And which one do you think I prefer?
I love both of these!
Too much little girl will make me insane. And too much dignity would make me serious. I enjoy playing both the characters – complementing and completing each other. That’s why I started this post saying that I am privileged.
So folks, let’s acknowledge our differences though belonging to the same species and celebrate a wonderful Valentine’s Day 😛
Thankful to all the He(s) and She(s) – you all have helped me discover the ME in me. Special thanks to Nabeel for coming up with this title (Yes, a member of the He-Club)!
And as I always say, add-ons are welcome!
(Guess, the longest post I’ve ever written. Excuse me for that).
Coffee Lovers – www.deviantart.com